Dear You,
What are you supposed to do when something connects with your heart so purely that you're speechless? (yes, without speech) The song lyric's at the bottom of this page are not (to the best of my knowledge) original to David Crowder, though it is his recording that has struck something deep inside of me. I hear something here... and I can't really explain it. It's more than the rousing war cry that the Supertones evoke from my spirit... it's more than the gentle affirmation that Jars of Clay so often presents to my mind. It's a pain in my chest. This song hurts and I don't exactly know why, except that I feel these words as if a million people were screaming them into my heart, "All of my life, I've been in hiding..." and all I can think is that I want them to COME OUT. The world around us, our lives, our experiences, so often our own people- have done so much to distort the nature and identity that God has intended for us. Yes, I know the effects of sin, the brutality of lies on lives, and there is something here that pulls from within me an enraged cry of "ENOUGH!" There are so many hiding... there are so many hidden. Hurt, broken, deceived, embittered, torn, shattered, puffed up- all hiding. I think back to the response Adam and Eve had in the Garden when they hid themselves. Who from?
From EACH OTHER...
and...
From God Himself.
We are not meant to be hidden.
We are meant to know Him and others and be known as well. Yet we are scared... confused... and for most of us, it has been for what seems like all of our lives that we've been in this place: HIDDEN. I can't really stand it anymore. I myself do not feel hidden- and that has been a very recent freedom, which is really what it is... FREEDOM. Yes, my tactics may seem and feel a bit different than what others may have done before me, but there is something here... something that can't not be done. There is something about this that I cannot escape. Identity... BEING... the question "WHO AM I?" these things, hearing you whisper them under your breath in frustration and even sorrow, they empassion my own soul... this song... these words... YOUR and HIS words speaking to me... my heart. There are so many "wishing there were someone" and I know that I am, in all actuality, someone, and I know that I can help you come out of hiding. I know it's what I was meant to do... to introduce you to Freedom by Name... to introduce you to Truth by Face. Not simply words that carry abstract meaning and connotations of hope or a fleeting and illusive ghostly Being... the master of "hide and seek"... no, not him, but the Being, the One, the Answer, the Revealed, the Exposed (not hidden) God. He, Who truly displayed HIS own nature, was more naked than you or I could ever imagine being, when He died in our places. That is a naked God, not a hidden God. And He reveals Himself so that you yourself may be exposed, and know who you actually are... that you may know Him as He created you to... that you may know the Truth... and that you may be FREE to BE who He created you to be.
Sigh...
Exhale... again... breathe out once more... that's all I've got. There's something here and it just tears me up and puts me together all at the same time. Maybe you'll give it a listen and hear nothing. Maybe you'll hear eternity beckoning. I guess all I'm trying to say is that I'm looking for you... I want to know you... I can't as long as you hide... I'm trying my very best to let you see me... to be in plain sight... not just so you see me, but so that you recognize that I want nothing more than for you to join us.
-Greg
.....................................................
Deliver Me
By: David Crowder* Band
From: Illuminate
Deliver me out of the sadness
Deliver me from all the madness
Deliver me courage to guide me
Deliver me Your strength inside me
All of my life
I've been in hiding
Wishing there was someone just like You
Now that You're here
Now that I've found You
I know that You're the One to pull me through
Deliver me loving and caring
Deliver me giving and sharing
Deliver me this cross that I'm bearing
Oh, deliver me...
Jesus, Jesus how I trust You
How I've proved You o'er and o'er
Jesus, Jesus precious Jesus
Deliver me
Come and pull me through
Come pull me through
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