Wednesday, November 26, 2008

November 26, 2008: My Apologies

Dear You,

It's so hard to watch you struggle. I know you see the way things are going, but why you resist still and hold back in this fear I do not know. Love will cast out fear... when will you trust me on this? Honestly, the time has come for me to be silent, you watch... I wait. He is moving and the time to go is near, will you come along? I see resistance in your eyes, I know it's not the way you'd prefer. In all honesty, it's not the way I'd prefer either. It'd be so much easier to simply sit down somewhere and share with you everything He's told me... I'm certain you'd feel confident in this move afterward, but such would not be to the benefit of your faith. We are all called to obey, we are all given that chance to step out in total abandonment of what we hoped for and simply know He will work it all for His glory. I do not know when, but I see you struggle and don't think for a moment it's not giving my heart an indescribable ache. It does. There is a blessing waiting for you in this freedom that you have never known or expected, but it cannot be spoken of or mapped out before your move. I know it's hard... it has been for all of us. I know it's scary... this is only the beginning. I know it's unnerving and entirely too inconvenient... whose priorities do you live for, anyway?

It is one thing to take the chains off, and quite another to leave the prison. You've come so far, you're at the doorway as we speak. Why not simply RUN through? You cannot lead others to a freedom you have not embraced. He will not let me come in for you and my mouth has been closed from calling your name. Listen for His word.... there will be no other voice worth hearing and no other word as powerful. Listen for His word and then obey. I've seen you close your eyes... did that make the voice go away? I've seen you cover your ears... did that ease His whisper in your heart? I've seen you run to the safer place... did that escape the tremble in your spirit? I know it did not, for I have been in all those places as well. I will continue praying for you, I simply can't stop. The time is getting shorter... but that has never been untrue. I suppose you can drag it out till the last second, but I know the pain that will be and I implore you, don't take it that far. Don't test His patience to that extreme... simply trust the word and direction you know you don't want to go but must because it is His and let's go. In all of this, I'm either insane or right on. Be assured this word and way is not my own; I'd much rather have things some other way as well, but as they are of His plans I cannot contradict/oppose them. At this time, you are watching... I am waiting... all I can say to you is, "Do not be afraid. He is good." I cannot pray for your strength to continue resisting, indeed I must pray you would be found weak before His call. I pray you would hear clearly and distinctly, by name and even face to face. I cannot pray for anything else than His will be done. Will you taste freedom yet? I believe it, the question is how long will you hold on to something destined to fall? It's entirely up to you. Either way, I love you and will wait either for your complete retreat or your approach. It is all I can do at this point. Listen for Him.


Love,
Me

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